Aug 11 Daily Entry -- New Trees

I was wounded and I couldn't find the courage to continue doing what I felt led to do, because I began to doubt whether there was any value in being me.

I came face to face with the question "what if the good that I have to offer isn't enough?" I couldn't bring myself to go out in the world and meditate and write because I didn't want to invest all my energy and time and thoughts into something that would just be seen as trash and discarded by others. I couldn't let them throw me away.

But I couldn't stay stagnant, and so I found new trees. People will always be around, full if hurt and hurtfulness, but there will always be new trees to sit under. With new trees come new ideas.

My old trees were tall and strong, flourishing in the sunlight, overlooking a whole community of people going about their day to day.

My new trees are short and slight. They live in shadows, and they create a hushed hide-away for those who are overcome by the world. It is an oasis of spirit.

There is water here, too, but this water is not a showpiece. It performs no tricks for the eyes. It speaks to us of its power, and demands that we are silent in appreciation. It cleanses us of words and worries. It renews us.

I am part water. Do I also have power?

If I am one with everything--I am of it and it is of me--what qualities do I share with the world around me?

There is a change coming for me. New trees, new work, new risks, new habits. Change is fine. Water changes its shape constantly. Like water, I will change my shape, and I will have all that I need.